When I bear children, one will be named Ikhlas.

There was a family gathering with a few other Muslims on Saturday. There were the elderly like my grandmother praying in the corner, the ladies lounging in the family room, prattling over family recipes. Then there were the kids. These loud, rambuctious toddlers running aimlessly through the halls, tripping over antiques, breaking glass, staining carpets with soda and spaghetti sauce, screaming at the top of their lungs for "mommy". This called for major loads of aspirin.

There was one boy in the crowd, who's name in particular, appealed to me. His name was Ikhlas. My first impression was based on my familiarity with Surah Al Ikhlas in the Quran. The most terse of all surahs which accounted for 1/3 of the Quran when recited. The Surah, itself, was so beautiful. It's meaning was even more.

Ikhlas literally means SINCERITY. A prized virtue of Islam. What kind of Muslim is a Muslim that observes no sincerity in their actions and intentions? What kind of Islam would there be if Al Ikhlas was not revealed to the Prophet Muhammad (saw)? There would be no Islam.

When I came home from the gathering, I read of the meaning of Surah Al Ikhlas. Although each verse continually glorified the name of Allah and his Absoluteness, I came to realize that this consistency in every verse of Ikhlas demonstrated the imporance of such sincerity in all deeds and actions of a Muslim.

This kind of faithfullness was a primary attribute of Prophethood, and "sincerity was its most lustrous dimension" There was this beautiful statement I read off of the internet that went by the following:
If we consider a deed to be a body, sincerity is its soul. If a deed represents one wing of pair of wings, sincerity is the other. A body without soul is of no worth, and nothing can fly with only one wing.

As victims of a universal rivalry for worldly gains (at Takawthur), we tend to overlook the importance of sincerity as Muslims. There is no prayer without khushoo, pure concentration for the sake of Allah swt. There is no charity without the intentions of relieving poverty. There is no Shahada without its words indelibly engraved into the hearts and minds of those that state it. There is no Muslim without heartfelt observance. There is no Muslim without sincerity.


A truly sincere person, or Muslim in this case, will not ensure themselves of entrance to Paradise, but would rather fear for their every minute on Earth. A true Muslim would keep sincerity as this mystery between only God and his or himself.

One who's heart is awakened to sincerity will not act in ostentation, for the approval of others, or worry about being praised or criticised. This person will not change for others, they will not change for themselves, and they will not change for the sake of changing.

One must remain sincere for the sake of Allah swt.



You should be sincere in all your deeds,

So that the Majestic Lord may accept them.

Sincerity is the wing of the bird of the acts of obedience.

Without a wing, how can you fly to the abode of prosperity?

----Mawlana Jalal al-Din al-Rumi

[This post is written for myself, first and foremost- ya'Allah, give me sincerity in my path to siratul mustaqeen]

Nothing is, but what is not.

Albert Einstein once said that the restriction of knowledge to an elite group destroys the spirit of society and leads to its intellectual impoverishment.

Breaking down this statement, it came to my realization that my political bias in the last entry wasn't bias- it was practically a lie.
Ha, and I of many people who patronize those who run their mouth. The very essence of propaganda is to capture an audience in its vulnerability and lure it to believe nothing that is, but what is not (inspiring words of Shakespeare- I still find some his plays lame). to dupe them into believing something is true, when really they express twisted lies to win over their views.

I hate to admit, but I became a Bush. Temporarily that is. Like him, I believed "We have every reason to assume the worst" And so I did. But of course, when there is not the worst of things, we make it up.

Although I was intending to write the facts, I unintentionaly wrote lies with false and incomplete information. After reading the background on Hizballah, I beg to differ with my previous statement, for I too assumed the worst and ran my mouth with lies.

Hizballah may be held accountable for terrorist activity and they claim to associate themselves with Hamas in their developing party in Iraq as well as Iran and Lebanon.

So who blames a politicaly party for standing up to the Israeli invasion of southern Lebanon? Every revolution has its bloodshed. Every controversy has its lies. I want to recant my perspective of Hisballah for refuting a previous statistic based on TIME magazine.

"the Bush Administration finds its hopes for democracy in Lebanon almost completely dependent on the good faith of Hizballah—a wholly owned subsidiary of Iran, which provides the group with $100 million to $200 million annually, according to intelligence estimates"

See where I went wrong? I foolishly assumed that Bush admistration had provided this money rather than Iran. I failed to also recognize that Hizballah's scope is far beyond a militant operation. It has been involved in building schools, clinics, hospitals, and other ways of benefitting Lebanon.

I don't mind being wrong, but my statements being false.

Uncommon Sense
Reader's Discretion Advised: Ok, so I base my opinion on only one source, so I'm inclined to writing bias. Forgive me if I have offended anyoen with my insight on Hizballah and his "khomeinistic" ideology because I certainly may be wrong. Doing your research takes time :-).

Joe Skinner came up with this brilliant idea to issue a fact-based pamphlet on what I'm assuming is a critique of American government and its policies. That's pretty intense for high school, don't you think? (the title of this entry is actually what the pamphlet is titled. Clever as hell, i say) Well it just so happens that a very minute percentage of the HHS crowd are worldly enough to take issues of conscience into their own hands.

So here's a trivia question for all of you: What political figure has a shot at the Nobel Peace Prize?

You guessed wrong. It's actually Bush! See, from my perspective, I'm hoping people consider Bush as the last person to earn godly prestige with the Nobel Peace Prize. Just give this a thought: Woodrow's 14 points, Truman's Marshall Plan, the Reagan Doctrine- and most of them are Democrats.

Then there's Bush and his completely idiotic initiative called the Bush Doctrine. Since when does the Nobel Peace Prize recognize world-changing plans based on military action over poverty and economic development?

Speaking in terms of current events, since when do we reward a leader of supporting a terrorist-linked organization just for the sake of promulgating democracy? Hizballah's chief motive is immersing Isreal in its own ruins rather than implementing a democratic atmosphere for Lebanon.

And so the wheel keeps turning until a spike punctures its base, leaving Bush and his doctrine in the dust.

SAT's SUCK!

Tomorrow are the SAT's.
This is the one test I've been dreading since middle school and being the tensely neurotic individual that I am, I want to get a good night's sleep and the mercy of Allah.

So in the brevity of my entry, I would like to let go of all the stress from now and until my next SAT date in May or June insha'Allah.

So with a good night's rest and a sweet awakening to the sweet glory of Fajr :D, I shall do my best.

In an attempt to create verisimilitude (SAT word I picked up the other day- this is sad!), I just need to think positive and mantain my composure. So yeah, breathe in, breathe out...

Let us perform this task with ease,
with His grace we will succeed.
In his name must we persevere
and on our knees do we beg
but with good stead we shall bare
whatever is destined to come ahead.
------

ABBISHRAH’ LEE S’ADREE WA YASSIR LEEE AMREE WAH’ – LUL U’QDATAM MIL LISAANEE YAFQAHOO QAWLEE
O Lord, expand for me my breast, make my task easy for me. Loose the knot of my tongue, that they may understand my speech
(T’AHA: 25 to 28)

"Ignorance is a night of mind. A night without a moon."

You have seen these very lines beneath one of the most phenomenal lines of Miss Angelou's poetry. Now that I'm expressing my thought about this quote, I come to realize the relationship between the two.

We have all encountered ignorance from people around us, the media, and even within our own minds. Even people like me who's biggest pet peeve is the ignorance of mankind, I too am naive. I always will be until I can see everything in this world. That's impossible. But keeping your eyes open isn't. Even then I have to struggle to be impartial to anything that I'm not familiar to. Maybe the act of judgement is intrinsic to human nature, but it is incumbent on us to filter our own judgements into what is fair and true.

Sources besides our company have this demonic impact on the way we percieve things. Sources like media, the root of all evil! It's a walking contradiction. It's this amalgam of truth, lies, and dubious he-said she-said dogmatism that deters any of us from knowing the truth and making our own judgements for that matter. The effective elements of yellow journalism belies the main role of media to act as this channel between the outside world and our living room tv sets. It's darkly humourous how this source of exposure permits us to embrace reality and yet recoils us from the very depths of understanding the truth. That's where our job comes in. Media provides, we must filter.

I remember the other day a friend of mine had called someone a "spick". Unaware that this term was equally pejorative to "nigger", "chink", or "flip", I jokingly called my Latin friend a spick. Kudos for me- I just proved to myself how completely open-minded I am! Sadly, not. Seeming offended to my statement, I couldn't stop thinking about how inane my decision was. Weeks laters, I rehashed this previous comment with her and being the extremely chill person that she is, she understood. Sure, you curse at your friends jokingly just because they're your friends and that atmosphere allows you to do so. But where does my point stand when all in all, I did not know? I'm sincerely penitent for what I said.

My mind was a night without a moon. But only one night, before it will be full again. And I will rise.


"Unless you turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them and be one of the ignorant ones (jaahileen)." [Surah Yusuf (12) Aayah 33]

I am Not a Teacher, But an Awakener.
March 6 2005

It was my cousin Aaminah's birthday on Saturday, turning the notorious 9! I got to see my homegirl, Andi who is leaving for Morocco next week. I just want to wish her a safe trip and stay. Learn all that you can about a new culture foreign to yours, understand it, and share it. :-) I can't wait to hear about her experience.

Anyways I was hoping a few people would read this post and give me a few suggestions on books to read.

I've been so busy lately and I've gotten through Yorum Binur's My Enemy, Myself in barely two weeks. :-(

Books in mind are Sun Tzu's Art of War, Dreyfus Affair, Karl Marx's Communist Manifesto, Hamza Yusuf's Purification of the Heart, Aley Haley's Roots, and Clockwork Orange.
People give me suggestions! No fantasy fiction crap. Harry Potter and Lord or the Rings should be burned. :-) lol, you get my point.

And I have yet to read Br. Alejandro's Islam and Democracy.

Peace.

Diurnal Affairs of the Iraq War

Hopefully I don't prattle on in this entry, but there was this site that caught my eye earlier by the AFSC.
http://www.afsc.org/eyes/about-the-exhibit.htm
Click "Watch the Movie" on the left column.

My initial response to this movie was a speechless one. The image of over 1500 boots lying infront of the white house as a symbol of American military deaths in Iraq.

And then they announce body count of not only the American military, but Iraq's casualty in men, women, and children. The statistics are disconcerting and leave you almost emotionless, knowing you can't do anything about it.
But you can.


Ya Allah, Give us the strength to work for the good of all humanity and against what is harmful to all of us. Ameen.

What Struggles May Bare
1 March 2005

"I see a beautiful city and a brilliant people rising from this abyss, and, in their struggles to be truly free, in their triumphs and defeats, through long years to come, I see the evil of this time and of the previous time of which this is the natural birth, gradually making expiation for itself and wearing out. . . ." Charles Dickens.

Life comes and goes. The time in which life bares struggles are the best of times, and yet the worst of times. This is when life has fallen into a state of imbroglio, yet we dust the dirt off ourselves to once again challenge what may come. What imperfection comes with our birth, in which a recondite series of events predestined for us twist and twirk the path that lie ahead of us? Without this struggle, what would we have to life for? Perfection is chaos, and nothing more.

It is our duty to make conjectures about life, even though we are clueless about what God has put forth in our futures. Taking risks isn't always a bad thing, especially when the case involves changing for the good, and overcoming the bad.

We are left alone to decide, by ourselves. God can only help us when we change the conditions within ourselves.

Unconventionality within the Mind
28 Feb 2005

Really there is so much I want to say, so much I want to believe, as well as dream over. This is a blog, and I'm trying hard to abide by the invisible rule of blogs : conciseness (and rambling crap, but that's not me, thank you :-) ).

Then again , I try to be unconventional at the same time. It's this vibe one can feel when someone has observed a foreign, somewhat independent trend. I consider myself to be borderline conventional, assimilating to what western culture has provided me, yet cautiously testing my boundaries. Al though that may be in my perspective, I have realized how many people would oppose me in saying that I'm probably much more unconventional than others.

Niqaab, for example. How much more unconventional can you get in a popculture-ified nation of casual permiscuity, vice, and liberties? Aligning liberty to vice is idiosynchratic in itself. And I realized, that with more exposure to whats out there, not only in the world that I live in, but what may be this intrinsic world within the very depths of my thoughts, is that I'm changing.

With every word, action, and emotion lighting a fire in my mind, it triggers this sense of change within me, and alhamdulillah, it has been more for the good. I have gone from quixotic to realistically hopeful, from music-obsessing to artistic expression of one's spirituality, from naive teeny bopper to a striving hijabi. And I continue. I continue to hope, to express, and to strive.

Most significantly, I think of my existence. Can we really prove it? Am I real? How do I know for sure that I live a different life in a warped dimension? How do I know that I did nt come to exist now, rathe rI have been implanted with a certain memory so I can be decieved into believing I have been real all this time? How do I know that I am conscious, I am alive, that I am not experimented like a hamster in its cage? How do I know?
Allahu Alim

"Turner of the hearts, keep our hearts steadfast on thy deen."